In preparation of a new addition arriving in a few months, I have been transitioning into some changes that I see will be happening. Our bedtime routine, for instance, is one of the big changes. This had been going well until a few nights ago when a melt down occurred. I laid in my own bed, exhausted and weary of my motherly duties, with my two children screaming for me across the hallway from their room. In order to excuse myself in my own mind, I selfishly determined that when the baby comes they will have nights they will have to go to sleep without me in the room. With that in mind, I laid there frustrated and growing more upset as their little hearts yearned for more of me than I had left to give. Then I began crying as my emotions were torn between the choices of helping my kids transition, caring for myself and the baby I am carrying or answering the pleas of two tired and restless toddlers. When my husband finished his shower, he came upstairs and went into the kids room.
I was reminded that I am not alone in this journey and I have a reliable partner that I am more than thankful for.
I listened as our kids immediately settled into their covers and laid quietly as their Daddy told his silly stories. They giggled and their hearts were content as the guidance and comfort they desired had found them. Across the hall, my own heart grew more restless as I realized that this was what they needed - what they were crying out for was more time and love. Had I not that to give my children? I could not stop crying. I was crying out to my Father to help guide and comfort me, just as my kids had been.
I crawled out of bed and went across the hall, then I laid beside my boy to listen to my husbands stories and be with my growing family. My little fella snuggled up beside me and said “Mama you’re beautiful.” God has always had a way of speaking to me through him and this is what he has told me time and time again recently and always when I’ve needed to hear it most. I knew I had found myself right where I should be - with my family, regardless of routine or changes.
As I laid there, I remembered when I was pregnant with Jayden and would tuck Peyton in at night. I would pray for him and then snuggle beside him and cry. I would cry because I couldn’t imagine having any more love to give another child! But as soon as our baby girl entered the world, I finally understood that God would grow my love into something far greater than I thought possible.
He provided enough love.
In that moment He gently assured my heart that when this baby arrives, He will again provide. Not only more love but strength to care for the children He chose to put in my care. He will provide the partnership between my husband and I the ability to raise our children in a healthy, Godly and loving environment. He will provide for me the rest and time I need for myself. He will provide for me, my husband and my children ALL of our needs - be them emotional, financial, relational, etc.
Because He is Jehovah-Jireh. My God is Provider.
What that you are crying out for? Take your concerns, your thoughts, your worries and share your heart with a God who provides every need for us. You are never alone in your journey. Whether or not you have a partner to share your journey with here on earth, when we choose to partner with God, we have the greatest partner and provider there is!
“And my God will provide all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ.” Philippians 4:19
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